Barely

Just when I think I'm over something... Today's tennis match was streaky. I thought I played all right during doubles, but singles was another story. It was a crazy match on both ends. I lost the first two games, won the next five, lost the next two and then won the deciding game to win 6-4, carelessly squandering match points along the way. My opponent seemed more nervous than me and I didn't know what kind of game to play.
I lost that calm quiet where I just... play. I want it back and my goal is to not make what happened today a habit. Hopefully win or lose, I can return to playing the kind of game that I want to play. I don't want the nerves to come creeping back in. I've dealt with them for too long and thought our divorce was final.